Restart and reset

Tonight mark the day that i been repulsive eating ravenously the bread which normal people would take a week to consume i take all in one seating. Thus i got to reset n restart my brain how i should exercise my portion control. Hence thats all from me tonight till we meet again

FUCKED UP

Today i just does not feel good about myself. Its like the aftermath of eating a bad diet, i dun feel sastisfied. its like im not hungry but im not happy. you know that in order to feel happy after eating you have to eat something good. However i dont feel it
or should i stuff myself until i feel good bout my self im feeling badly sad. im 24 and yet no degree. my family is poor and have lots of debts. my mom is single parent brought us up. my siblings pon not good. fucked up. compare me to her like langit n bumi. ya allah aq tak nak compare aq dgn umat mu yg lai tappi semmgnya aq tak mampi

Break Fast

Today im doing a ramadhan replacing  fast. Its like not that im not use to fasting but after i break my fast i always craving for something sweet. im contemplating whether i should placate my hunger for sweet food with something alternative sweets.

Above entry is about me doing my ganti puasa. Now today im doing detoxifying day as i would not consume any caloric substances. The only thing i allow my my self to consume is roselle tea and water. This is due to my action in the past couple of days has been terribly eating trashy food. I would forgive myself from adrift the path. Hence, I choose to fast for as long as I could.

Now as I experience it myself. I can conclude my body and mind like to have consume hot food and drink. As I would only feel satisfied after consuming something warmly serve. Now I swore I would never consume anything cold anymore. As cold food sabotage my brain reception of fullness. All in all i would regards this as a succesfull experiment. Im a person whom like to eat warm meal. Damn I miss my mom and the time I would come back from school where my mom waiting for me with hotly serve meal on the dining table. I love my mom thou. In conclusion savour the moment you being through every second. Even that time you taken it for granted you could never relived those time. However, you regret not appreciate it you would never have a chance to get it back. definitely you just have to live on and find another opportunity to overcome it and create a new moments.

1. I miss the moment my mom come to my majlis anugerah cemerlang. how i got to make my mom proud of me looking at me walking up the stage ade receiving the plaque. I miss how I does not have the chance to have a picture with my mom at the moment. I vow to myself I would create another myriad of chances for me to make my mom proud again watching her daughter take up the stage.

2. I miss the moment of my mom waiting for me after each round I play. I never thought that I would regret to not feeling grateful how i have my mom to wait for me and take care of me.